Potting shed conflict: Minecraft housing issue spills over into couple’s real-life home

A man has asked whether he is in the wrong for refusing to tear down a potting shed that his girlfriend says obstructs the view from her house. Picture: Reddit/Minecraft

A man has asked whether he is in the wrong for refusing to tear down a potting shed that his girlfriend says obstructs the view from her house. Picture: Reddit/Minecraft

Published Mar 19, 2023

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When Minecraft etiquette, or the lack thereof, makes it into the bedroom of a real-life couple, you have to know that this stuff is serious – especially as they are playing in Survival Mode.

So serious, in fact, that people responding on this ‘AITA’ sub-Reddit are debating the issue in a manner that one would expect from a housing tribunal case.

Only one person had the bricks to call the man out on what he feels is a pathetic issue.

“You’re a grown ass 38-year-old asking Reddit about a f***ing Minecraft house? FFS mate, is getting your girlfriend pissed at you worth a few blocks in a game?”

He was of course, immediately shut down.

But back to the story: The user, named ComplexThomas – so we will just call him Thomas, asks the question, “AITA for building a potting shed next to my girlfriend’s house in Minecraft?” He then explains that he and his 35-year-old partner recently found a dark forest biome and set up a base. They discussed plans for building a house on top of a hill, and cleared the ground for it.

“I helped mine resources and gather supplies. I decided to build a potting shed next to her house, about four tiles away. At first, it seemed fine and I received compliments about the build.”

However, things changed shortly thereafter; one night, before going to bed Thomas says his girlfriend – we’ll name her Cara, was “unusually quiet”.

“I asked her what she was thinking, and she said, 'the potting shed'. She said that it was ruining the view in front of the house and, after some clarification, divulged that she didn't want it so close by...she thought it would be smaller.”

The potting shed is 10x15x10.

“I said I would compromise and move it back, but she insisted that it be destroyed altogether, although saying this with a smile as we are still openly communicating.

“I built the potting shed close so that we would feel we're creating a joint area to live in as we explore this rich biome, but now she seems to want the entire mountain top, and I'm relegated to the steppes near our farmland.”

Thomas says Cara’s argument is that she spent a long time building her house and used many difficult-to-get resources – which he mined. Now, however, she says the potting shed blocks her front and side view.

“I feel that she's being controlling, and that this behaviour may spill over. However, I do see her point, and if I were to make a building, I might be similarly annoyed by the obstruction to the view. But I must point out that this never came up as an issue while I was building it for several hours.

“AITA for telling her that I do not wish to break down my potting shed? Or is this Minecraft bad etiquette that I should have known to start with?”

He then posts these screenshots for clarity, adding that he will gladly accept criticism and acknowledge being wrong if that is what he is.

After careful evaluation of the evidence, Redditors explained that Cara may actually have a case for the potting shed to be destroyed. Otherwise, they advised that Thomas could change some of the aspects of his build.

“Is the potting shed the building made out of dark oak? If it is, I can see her point,” states Supahpossum.

“It's larger than a shed, as big as the house, and in a different material. It's not sympathetic to the rest of the aesthetic. Can you make the shed smaller, or in similar materials to the house?”

Thomas accepted this viewpoint and said he could perhaps change the materials and also move the shed back a bit.

Mok000 agreed with Cara, and when asked by Thomas what the reasons for this were, so that he could understand, the Redditor replied: “You partner’s build is elegant, yours...is not. Pallet, build style, proximity, everything.”

Another commentator, A-SeriousArtichoke13 could also see Cara’s side of the story, saying that the potting shed is “very much clashing with her house design”.

“I could see where she was okay with it while you're building because it's not completed and sometimes it takes a while to get perspective on Minecraft, especially when builds aren't complete (on both ends)...

“Perhaps a compromise is in order; have her help you design it so it fits better or have her help you move it. That would be fair seeing as how long it took you to make it. I really like the dark oak vibe you've got going for sure.”

One Redditor, mongster83, stated that he has had similar problems when playing Minecraft with his romantic partners and that “it is not worth it”.

RoystonMontgomery wrote: “I think if her house was there first you at least need to apply to her for planning permission in advance, submit the designs for her to approve etc.”

Others also agreed that Thomas should use materials that match the aesthetic of his girlfriend’s house.

The most detailed response, however, came from cymballin who, after seeing the size of Thomas’ shed, believed that there was a clash.

“The house has a modern cottage vibe going on whereas the potting shed looks more rugged nordic; then there is the obvious difference of the colour palettes. I can understand how that, at first, it might not have been so jarring, but then as it got larger it was then a bit overbearing considering how close and different they are. If the shed were smaller, a little farther, and/or reflected a similar design, that would help.”

The Redditor then goes on to answering Thomas’ questions, saying that he is ‘not the a**hole’ for telling Cara he did not want to break down his potting shed, nor is his behaviour bad etiquette that he should have been aware of.

“No, you're being honest with your feelings. That is not being an 'A'. Now, if you said adamantly that you would not ever move it, then quite possibly...Minecraft etiquette? I don't know about any grand MC etiquette, but I generally play solo. However, when I play with the kids and begin building in a new area, one person is the architect/designer for that area. That person calls the shots, and the others are either willing to help (we almost always are) or we work on our own thing elsewhere.

“So what to do in the short term? Is this her spot? Even though you may have put in the hard work for the materials (the concrete alone, I see you) then I would see how you can add to it while supporting her vision/design.

“Is it your spot together? You could certainly try to find some compromise, but just make sure you both are happy with that choice and not resentful. Maybe it would be best to make this ‘her spot’ and, for the next location, you get to be the architect...I feel like this is more of a place to grow in your relationship than it is a lesson in Minecraft etiquette.”

Cymballin then offers some relationship advice in regards to the game: “The best thing, moving forward, is to be more open about what you both want to achieve when playing together, both in the small scale (building in a new specific area) and the grander scale (what you want out of the world, adventuring, large builds, defeating the ender dragon, etc.) And as you might be able to guess, this extends to the real world, too.”

He then ends with: “Okay, that about wraps up this session. That'll be 80 emeralds. You can settle up with the receptionist out front. Also an unrequested critique: add upside-down stairs to the eaves to give it a more even thickness. And how many people is that cantilevered porch rated for? ;)”

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